• Divorce Mediation
  • Financial Consultant
  • Support Groups
    ▲
    • Divorce Support Groups For Women
    • Divorce Support Groups For Men
  • Post-Divorce Transition
  • Work With Us
    ▲
    • Contact
    • Schedule An Appointment
    • Pay Now
  • About Us
  • Resources
    ▲
    • Blog
    • Vlog
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer

281-505-8177
CONTACT US

SCHEDULE A
FREE CONSULTATION

Contact Us: 281-505-8177

Divorce Strategies Group

Divorce Strategies Group

Denise French

  • Divorce Mediation
  • Financial Consultant
  • Support Groups
    • Divorce Support Groups For Women
    • Divorce Support Groups For Men
  • Post-Divorce Transition
  • Work With Us
    • Contact
    • Schedule An Appointment
    • Pay Now
  • About Us
  • Resources
    • Blog
    • Vlog

CDFA professionals

Ten Financial Pitfalls for Women in Divorce

January 4, 2021 By Denise French, CVA, MAFF, CDFA, CRPC

During divorce, many women are concerned about financial survival—and with good reason. Studies show after divorce, the wife’s standard of living may drop almost 73% while the husbands may increase by as much as 42%.  Many factors combine to lower a women’s standard of living after divorce. Child support may not be adequate to cover the true costs of child rearing, and she might have lost many important years of career growth, making it difficult for her to get back on her feet after divorce.  By familiarizing yourself with the ten financial pitfalls of divorce for women, you can save yourself a lot of heartbreak and hassle in the future.

1. Believing you cannot afford an experienced attorney 

Divorces are expensive.  There is no doubt.  The fees involved for a regular divorce with a qualified attorney are expensive – attorney fees, therapist bills, new living expenses and other advisor fees. Further, the funds previously used to support one household must now stretch to support two. If you are contemplating divorce, now is the time to begin amassing the funds you’ll need to stay afloat.  Think of a divorce as a long term financial cost and plan accordingly before you file or when you first start to believe you spouse may be checking out of the marriage.

If you are not able to save cash for the divorce process, you still have the ability to hire good support for yourself.  You can open a credit card in your name alone, while you are married, and use the marital income to qualify for a card.  That card can be used for divorce related costs and at the end of the divorce, it is placed on the marital inventory as a debt of the marriage.  You have power!! Contact Divorce Strategies Group on this topic and we will walk you through what to do.

2. Bad timing

Divorce is a marathon event which requires careful preparation. Before you act on the divorce, consult with legal and financial professionals, and read about the subject. Also, think about where you are in life. Did you or your spouse just start a business?  Are you or your spouse just about to go back to school for a graduate degree and amass student debt?  Life stages like this may cause you to pause on the divorce or act quickly before major community debt amasses.  If you’ve been married eight years or just hit the nine year mark and your spouse is the major breadwinner, you might want to stick it out a little while longer before you file for divorce.  In order to collect on your ex-spouse’s social security you must be married for at least 10 years from the date of marriage to the actual date of divorce.   Finally, don’t just pack up and drive away in a car  needing major repairs with old clothes on and kids who need braces.  Fix what you need fixed, buy what you want to buy and get your kids situated with what they need before you leave, as much as possible.

3. No records

The three most important words during divorce are: document, document, document. Try to obtain copies of all financial records before your divorce begins. Make a clear copy of all tax returns, loan applications, wills, trusts, financial statements, banking information, brokerage statements, loan documents, credit card statements, deeds to real property, car registration, insurance inventories, and insurance policies. Also, copy records you can use to trace your separate property, such as an inheritance or gifts from your family. The corpus and the capital appreciation of these assets should remain your separate property as long as you can document them. Copies of your spouse’s business records can be a treasure map illustrating where hidden assets, if any, are buried.

4. Overlooking assets

Texas is a community property state. That means every dollar earned during the marriage belongs equally to each spouse. It matters not that the income went into your bank account, a business, a 401k or a second home – those funds belong to each spouse.  Half of everything is yours! Even if you don’t want an asset, it can be used to trade for something you do want. Inventory safe deposit boxes; track down bank and brokerage accounts; keep pay stubs, retirement plans, and insurance policies. Don’t overlook hobbies or side businesses that might have expensive equipment or generate income.

5. Ignoring tax consequences

Tax consequences are one of the most overlooked or forgotten issues in divorce finance. Most financial decisions have tax ramifications.  Should you take the brokerage account or the retirement plan? Should you keep the house or sell it now? Don’t ignore the hidden tax costs of divorce in making these decisions. Your situation may require some calculation by an accountant or divorce financial planner to determine if you are really getting the best deal. And, if there is a chance your past joint tax returns omitted income or overstated deductions, you may want to seek an indemnification clause to protect yourself if the IRS decides to audit.

6. Thinking ignorance is bliss

During divorce ignorance is not bliss, it’s expensive. As painful as it may be, diving in and participating in the process can help you recover more quickly from the divorce because you will have a healthy sense of control over the process, be focused on practical things, and be working with your ex to get things done. Also, taking an active role in the negotiations can help you achieve a better settlement.  You will also likely have less conflict and litigation after the divorce, better compliance from your ex, and better sharing of information about the children. Your attorney will give you valuable legal advice which should weigh heavily into your decision making process, but all of the decisions are ultimately up to you.

7. Mixing money and emotion

This is really tough for women who were hurt during the divorce, however, it is crucial. Try to think of this from an unemotional, business like perspective.  This is likely the largest business transaction you will make in your life – treat it as such.  View your attorney as a paid professional rather than a friend or confidante. When your grief is overwhelming, go to a friend or support group, not to your attorney, who is billing you at his or her normal hourly rate. In addition, revenge is not helpful in long term planning and financial negotiations.  It will not make you happy to declare war on your ex – it will likely just make you broke. Making the effort to bring the divorce to a successful conclusion with as little rancor as possible can help you financially today and in the future.

 8. Not fighting for what’s legitimately yours

Divorce negotiations are not only about survival; they are about molding your long term financial future. It’s important to not let wanting to please others or look like “the good girl” get in the way of taking what is legitimately due you. You have to insist on getting what you legally deserve. Even if you hope you will eventually be able to reconcile with your ex, it is not guaranteed (you are getting divorced after all). Letting him keep all of his 401k because he’s worked so hard could put you in the poor house when you are older while he enjoys a great life.  No matter your feelings, stand up for yourself and get your legal share. If you reconcile, that’s fine. If you don’t, you’ll still be able to take care of yourself financially.  Taking what is rightfully yours (50% at least) is not being greedy, it is protecting your future and honoring your own value as a human being. No matter what your spouse says, you are worth it!

9. Taking the payment overtime versus the lump sum

Receiving a guaranteed, monthly, court ordered income sounds great doesn’t it? Yes, but what if your spouse loses his job? Becomes disabled? Quits his job and moves overseas to work? What if he just stops paying? What if his industry goes through 2 years of consolidation and he is laid off time and time again? What if he starts his own business?  We feel like getting a lump sum is much better than a series of payments – court ordered or not. If he stops paying the court ordered support, guess what you have to do to get him to pay it again? Yes, go back to court.  At some point, those court costs can be more than what you would get from him in the first place.  Take the up-front money instead of the income when given a choice.  You can create your own income stream for that lump sum payment or use it for other financial needs in the future.

10. Not getting good professional advice

Right now, you need all the help you can get! Divorce can be very complicated, so don’t try to do it all yourself. Hire an attorney who can give you excellent advice—even if he or she is expensive. Engage a divorce financial advisor to help you make wise financial decisions and create a roadmap for your future. Find a good therapist to help you emotionally. Don’t skimp now on matters which will affect the rest of your life.

Schedule a 30 minute complimentary consultation today to discuss your specific situation or call us at 281-505-8177 to discuss your concerns.

Filed Under: Divorce Finance Tagged With: #divorce recovery group, #divorcemediation, #divorcesupport, attorney, business valuation, CDFA professionals, divorce, divorce attorney, Divorce Coping Tools, divorce lawyer

Divorce Financial Planning – Top 3 Strategies

February 2, 2020 By Denise French, CVA, MAFF, CDFA, CRPC Leave a Comment

Divorce can really mess with your mind. I know because I’ve been there. It is like my brain was removed from my head and placed beside me for about a year. (It does come back!) The intelligent together woman that I once was turned into an emotional, brain-fogged, unorganized basket case. I tried very hard to keep it together, but I was not at my best. I felt paralyzed and incapable of coherent thought when I very much just wanted to focus and plan for my future with my young child. Divorce financial planning in Texas would have been the solution.

What’s a person to do? First things first.

1. Know the Basic Finances of the Home

What’s your role when it comes to the family finances? Do you handle the bill paying? Are you “in the loop” on all your bank accounts or are you in the dark? What about investment accounts or retirement plans? Do you have any? If you’re in the dark, you need someone to help you turn the lights on – and FAST! This is where a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst or CDFA® practitioner can really help.

Has your spouse blocked you from your financial life?  If so, a CDFA® may help you shed light on the situation.  A good CDFA® can walk through your taxes and identify brokerage and bank accounts.  He or she can also walk through any financial statements you have and help you identify where assets may be hidden.  A Master Analyst in Financial Forensics or MAFF® a different type of professional who can help you forensically trace bank accounts or brokerage accounts to look for hidden assets.  There is help available – you do not have to stay in the dark.  One client brought in a box of papers from years of stuffing them in drawers and closets.  We found 3 rent houses and $100,000 in CD money!

If you and your spouse are cooperative, ask for statements on all your asset accounts and your most recent tax returns so you can find a CDFA® practitioner to help you out with divorce financial planning in Texas and bring you up to speed. A CDFA® professional is specially trained in the financial aspects of divorce and will be your best friend in this process!

post-divorce in Texas

2. Think About Your Future

This part will be hard but start thinking about what the next phase of your life looks like. Unfortunately, this has to happen at the same time that you are grieving what you THOUGHT the next phase was going to look like. But if you allow yourself some space, it can actually be healing and fun. You now have the chance to start over again.

What did you used to dream of doing that got lost while you were married? Is it time to go back to school? Maybe a cool downtown loft condo should replace that huge family home that you had to keep clean. Whatever you dream of, you will need your budget and financial picture top of mind. That way, if your dreams outsize your wallet, you know you have some serious planning to do!

3. Build A Single Identity for Yourself

Often through marriage all the credit cards, mortgages, loans, etc. are in the names of both spouses. All of those accounts will have to be closed or converted. Immediately open a checking and savings account in your own name to begin the process of establishing your own financial identity. Be sure to put some things in place while you’re still married because after the marriage is over, your credit picture may not be nearly as strong. Next, find a good rewards credit card to apply for in your name alone so that you will be assured of having access to credit after the divorce and maybe even during if legal fees are necessary.

These steps may seem small but they are valuable first steps to get you thinking financially and looking out for your future. You can get through this, and a little divorce financial planning in Texas help from a CDFA® friend is a great place to start.

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: alimony, CDFA professionals, divorce attorney, divorce lawyer, resources, texas divorce

Five Signs of Financial Infidelity

August 26, 2019 By Denise French, CVA, MAFF, CDFA, CRPC Leave a Comment

Marriage is challenging in many different ways but adding dishonesty to the mix can be disastrous. Trust is at the foundation of any good relationship and erosion of trust will destroy a marriage at record speed. What usually comes to mind when we talk about infidelity is the cheating spouse who’s taken a lover. But there’s another, more subtle and potentially even more devastating infidelity that is often overlooked.  Financial infidelity can show up in a wide variety of ways and can range from minor offenses like that credit card he doesn’t know about to far more serious deceptions like filtering money to family members over many years to siphon off a personal nest egg from marital assets.

How do you recognize when it’s happening to you? Here are five signs that you should watch for.

#5 – You Haven’t Seen Bank Statements or Financial Documents in Years

NEVER let one spouse handle all the finances without meeting monthly to go over your balance sheet and goals. This is the perfect opportunity to get yourselves on the same financial team! If you’ve never done this, there is no better time to start than NOW! If you ask and the “keeper of the finances” gets nervous, procrastinates, or doesn’t want to meet with you, major red flag!

financial infidelity

#4 – Unexplained Mood Changes

Is your spouse becoming easily agitated? Do they pop off with anger or display impatience that is out of proportion to the event? Financial turmoil causes stress! And that stress will reveal itself! In Part 1 of this series, you might recall the situation I described where the husband had whittled away two million dollars in savings over 10 years. The wife described an increasingly angry man who was very defensive about any perceived shortfalls in his behavior. He started a pattern of explaining himself in every little situation as though he were convincing himself that he was a “good guy”. He also became more and more withdrawn. When she would ask about anything related to their finances, he would bite her head off with things like, “Stop nagging me! I’ve got it under control! What are you worried about?”

#3 – A Lifestyle That Doesn’t Match Earnings

Is your spouse a highly paid professional but you haven’t had a decent vacation in years? Does he/she have a Mercedes job but drives a Honda and insists you do the same? Are you on an “allowance,” but your spouse is not? Do you have to ask permission for every purchase? All of these are indicators of financial infidelity and shouldn’t be tolerated in a mutually respectful marriage. It’s reasonable to have a money plan with budgets and goals. But if you are forbidden from monitoring and enjoying the fruits of your frugal lifestyle, it’s another red flag.

#2 – Car Insurance Rates Go Up

If you get a letter from your insurance company notifying you that your auto insurance rates are going up due to a change in your rating, this could be a loud indicator that the other spouse not only has credit cards you don’t know about but isn’t making the payments on time either.

financial infidelity

#1 – Mail Stops Being Delivered

If you notice that a Southwest Visa credit card statement comes every month and always has and then it stops, or if the online passwords are no longer working when you decide to look at the bills, beware. Ask about it, of course, but a very common method of financial deception is to have bills sent to the office or a relative’s, so they aren’t discovered. If you have gone digital, you should have access to passwords and take a look at those bills and balances regularly.

These things are no fun to deal with and I’ve seen this type of behavior ruin one marriage after another. When it comes to money, honesty is always the best policy – especially between spouses. Have a conversation with your mate today and be sure you’re both on the same page.

If you feel you are headed for divorce and unsure of what that might mean for you financially call us for a financial strategy session.  We will help you start in the right direction.

 

Filed Under: Divorce Finance Tagged With: CDFA professionals, finances

CDFA™ Professionals can help to create financial settlements that work – both now and in the future

August 12, 2019 By Denise French, CVA, MAFF, CDFA, CRPC Leave a Comment

A Certified Divorce Financial Analyst™ (CDFA™) professional can help you address the financial issues of divorce with reports that can help achieve settlements that work today – and in the future. If you are considering hiring CDFA professionals, read on for more information about how he or she can help you.

A CDFA™ professional can:

• Complete the detailed financial work for the client and the client’s attorney, making case preparation and settlement easier
• Provide in-depth analysis of the short- and long-term financial effects of a proposed settlement
• Work as a consultant or expert witness

woman with people in background

About CDFA Professionals

A Certified Divorce Financial Analyst™ (CDFA™) professional has:
• Graduated from the Institute for Divorce Financial Analysts™
• Extensive financial expertise in the fields of financial services, accounting, or law
• Received specialized training in the financial issues of divorce
• Fulfilled continuing education requirements

Founded in 1993, the Institute for Divorce Financial Analysts™ (IDFA™) is the most established and recognized designation in financial planning for divorce. In order to become a CDFA professional, a candidate must successfully complete a series of exams based on a self-study course offered by the Institute, be in good standing with his or her firm or broker/dealer and any governmental regulatory agencies, and complete 20 hours of continuing education courses every two years.

How a CDFA Professional help a Family Law Attorney?

CDFA professionals help lawyers and their divorcing clients address the special financial issues of divorce with data that can help achieve equitable settlements. A CDFA pro is trained to:
• Produce powerful case exhibits in the form of spreadsheets and graphs
• Give lawyers professional support to make sure they’ve covered all the financial “bases”
• Provide litigation support to divorce lawyers
• Serve as a financial expert on divorce cases
• Analyze the financial implications of different divorce settlement proposals
• Create a rock-solid personal financial analysis for the client
• Make sure the client understands the short-term and long-term financial impact of different settlement proposals

How a CDFA Professional can help the divorcing client

• Separate vs. Marital property
• Valuing and dividing property
• Debt, credit, and bankruptcy
• Retirement and pensions
• Spousal and child support
• Options for the Matrimonial Home
• Tax problems and solutions

The Experts Talk about CDFA Professionals

“However the divorce [financial analyst] enters the process, the participation of a financial specialist can benefit both clients and lawyers, according to Sandra Morris [former president of the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers]. While the [CDFA] wades through the financial morass of a divorce, the attorney is freed up to focus on legal issues.”
– Lawyers Weekly

“The professions of divorce financial analysis and matrimonial law have a long, prosperous future together. The skilled CDFA brings rationality to an irrational situation.”
– Frederic J. Seigel, Esq.
Partner, Fitzmaurice & Seigel, CT

“CDFAs can provide invaluable information that allows the court to arrive at a fair, equitable, and just resolution – not just at the moment of trial, but down the road as well.”
– Honorable Kathleen M. McCarthy, JD
Family Court Division Judge, MI

“[CDFAs] watch out for tax snafus, help clients obtain health insurance after a split, and demystify tough-to-value private-equity or hedge-fund investments.”
– The Wall Street Journal

Local Financial Support for Your Divorce Needs

Denise French - Local Financial Support for your Divorce NeedsWe at Divorce Strategies Group are here to help you with your divorce case whether you are the client or the attorney. We not only have the professional experience to expertly help you navigate through the divorce financial and tax maze, but we also have the personal experience of walking through divorce ourselves with a complex financial estate.

Contact us for more information and resources on divorce, and to schedule your consultation.

Filed Under: Divorce Support Tagged With: CDFA, CDFA professionals, divorce, divorce attorney

Primary Sidebar

Recent Posts

  • How To Tell Kids You’re Getting Divorced
  • Taxes & Children: What Divorcing Parents Need to Know
  • What is a QDRO?
  • High Stakes, High Net Worth:
  • Why Choose Mediation Instead of Court?

Recent Comments

    Archives

    • May 2023
    • February 2023
    • January 2023
    • December 2022
    • August 2022
    • June 2022
    • May 2022
    • January 2022
    • June 2021
    • May 2021
    • April 2021
    • March 2021
    • February 2021
    • January 2021
    • December 2020
    • November 2020
    • October 2020
    • September 2020
    • August 2020
    • July 2020
    • June 2020
    • May 2020
    • April 2020
    • March 2020
    • February 2020
    • January 2020
    • December 2019
    • November 2019
    • October 2019
    • September 2019
    • August 2019
    • July 2019
    • June 2019
    • May 2019
    • April 2019
    • March 2019
    • February 2019
    • January 2019
    • November 2018
    • August 2018
    • July 2018
    • June 2018
    • April 2018
    • February 2018
    • January 2018

    Categories

    • Alternative Dispute Resolutions
    • Dividing Property
    • Divorce Coaching
    • Divorce Finance
    • Divorce Support
    • Family & Children
    • Mediation
    • Uncategorized

    Meta

    • Log in
    • Entries feed
    • Comments feed
    • WordPress.org

    Footer

    Copyright © 2023 - All Rights Reserved | Web Design by The Crouch Group | Log in